Foto sekadar hiasan. Assalam. Aku Kak Lang, aku pernah buat confession tahun 2018. Sapa ingat lagi masakan special mak aku malam tu nasi berlaukkan telur dadar. Yaaa cerita itulah. Disebabkan my story got published aku dah janji aku akan sambung cerita tu. Terima kasih admin yang kacak dan segak sebab publish kisah episod dua ni.
Aku terus jelah masuk stories yah. Tak nak intro panjang lebar. Ni aku taip sebab aku baru lepas menangis. Takda sebab pun, cuma baru tadi video call ramai-ramai dengan adik beradik semua sebab mak baru dapat v4ksin sinovac pagi tadi..
Macam biasalah, mak tak layan pun pertanyaan-pertanyaan aku walau pun aku da habis excited nak tau perasaan mak kena v4ksin, sebab mak sibuk bertanya khabar adik-adik aku yang jauh di perantauan. Aku pun jauh jugak, tapi masih dalam negeri yang sama.
Hehehe. Takde sapa yang comfort aku guys, aku comfort diri sendiri. Walaupun aku menangis tanpa suara masa tu, airmata aku deras jatuh.
Tapi aku senyum saja masa tu. Boleh bayang tak? Senyum dengan airmata yang menitis laju? Guess what? Masa ni aku da tingkatan 1.. Tapi still muka kena tampar dengan selipar.
Dan sebenarnya hidung adik berdrah sebab masa tu adik aku sedang ‘kunci’ aku dari arah belakang, adik aku nak buat style hantuk kepala aku dengan kepala dia, sekuat hati adik aku buat macam tu,
Aku toleh sebab nak elak adik aku buat macam tu, dan tiba-tiba hidung dia kena dekat dahi aku. Tapi nak buat macam mana, tak sempat explain lagi aku da kena penampar hehehe.
Dalam kejadian lain, dekat sekolah aku ada tolong cikgu angkat barang. Cikgu tu bagi hadiah pensil mekanikal dekat aku. Aku punya bangga bawa balik rumah malam tu nak tayang dekat mak dan adik-beradik, tapi abang aku patahkan sebab dia jeles.
Dengan emosi masa tu, aku koyakkan buku teks abang aku. Sehelai saja pun, nak koyak banyak, tak berani pulak aku.
Lepas tu, abang tumbuk dada aku. Mak tak suka kitorang lawan abang kitorang tu. Sekelip mata mak tarik rambut aku, menghadap muka mak, sambil mak tampar-tampar aku dengan ayat ‘berani lawan abang kau lagi?’
Aku tak jawab sebab aku tau kalau aku jawab tak pun mesti tamparan mak aku makin kuat sebab mak tak suka dengar suara aku. Sambil mak tampar aku tu, abang aku koyakkan buku latihan aku.
My favorite English exercise book because in that precisely book i got my favorite teacher’s advice telling me that I am a bright student and I keep it in my mind all the time. Tapi aku hanya mampu menangis tanpa suara, and semuanya berlalu begitu saja.
Malam tu aku kena tidur tanpa bantal, di ruang dapur sebagai hukuman melawan abang aku. Nasib baik arw4h nenek aku bagi kain sarung untuk aku pakai jadikan selimut malam tu. Tapi aku memang takde selimut pun selama ni haha aku just share dengan nenek saja..
Next memory, masa ni aku kena bantu mak buka gerai menjual makanan. Masa tu ada hari anugerah sukan dekat sekolah adik aku. Mind that masa ni aku da berusia 21 tahun. Cuti sem masa ni.
Aku tak masuk cerita macam mana aku boleh sambung belajar walaupun mak aku tak happy aku boleh dapat belajar jauh.
So aku kena tolong la mak aku kan. Dari buka payung, masak, sediakan tapak gerai, cuci bekas makanan semua aku kena buat.
Mak suka duduk tunggu customer. Tapi aku tak kisah sebab aku happy dapat buat mak aku happy. Walau pun aku penat, bagi aku inilah masanya untuk aku nak rapat dengan mak.
Tapi mak tak suka aku banyak cakap. Apa saja ayat yang keluar dari mulut aku, mak aku rasa menyampah. Hehehe walau pun aku excited nak cerita pengalaman aku dekat universiti.
Jadi sebabkan aku tak nak mak aku meluat dekat aku, aku better stop bercerita. Dan fokus menunggu customer.
Masa tu, adik aku video call la dengan mak, mak happy tak terkata fokus bercerita dengan adik-adik melalui video call tu.
Mak kata penat sebab kena menjual, blah blah blah tapi mak tak sebut pun nama aku. Yelah aku nak jugakla kena mention sebab aku sampai berpeluh ketiak kot nak bantu mak menjual ni.
Aku mampu tengok dari sudut meja saja sambil bergenang air mata walau pun aku senyum.
Beberapa minit lepas tu, adik aku yang sedang bersekolah dekat situ nak kena perform, mak aku arahkan aku rakam video adik aku tu. Dalam dewan guys, adik aku soloist nasyid.
Aku iyakan arahan mak, aku pegi penjuru dewan nak rakam. tapi mak bagi signal suruh rakam depan-depan pentas, di belakang kerusi vv1p
Boleh bayang tak? Aku ni dahla bangun dari pkul 4 pagi, kena masak macam-macam, aku siapkan payung dan tapak apa semua, dengan berpeluh dan berbau, muka berminyak dengan tudung sauk makcik-makcik tu, sebagai gadis 21 tahun, aku malu la nak ke depan.
Tapi mak buat muka dekat aku, jadi aku gagahkan jugak diri ke depan untuk rakam adik aku nyanyi. Aku toleh belakang, mak aku jeling aku, aku sedih dan malu guys.
Setelah selesai persembahan adik aku tu, aku cari tinggu mak dekat gerai. Tunggu punya tunggu, mak rupanya da balik..
Tumpang dengan jiran. So aku kena cari teksi, angkut semua barang jualan, tutup payung semua tu lah.
Sampai dekat rumah, mak sedang makan dengan abang dan adik.. Aku sebenarnya penat masa tu, tapi mak suruh hidang lebihan lauk jualan tadi untuk mereka makan.
Aku pun semangat nak hidang sebab aku yang masak lauk tu pagi tadi hehehe, dan boleh la aku join makan sekali. Aku tak makan sejak pagi tadi.
Korang kalau bisnes makan macam ni korang tahu la kan memang korang tak sempat makan pun.
Setelah hidang lauk,aku plan nak duduk sekali makan, tapi mak terus angkat pinggan dia duduk dekat depan tv. Aku tak jadi makan guys sebab mata da mula bergenang. Hahaha. Aduhai la kenapa hati aku sensitif sangat.
Guys, dalam bulai Julai ni adalah birthday aku. Da lepas pun. Mak tak pernah ingat pun aku lahir bila hahaha. Bulan March haritu birthday adik perempuan aku. Masa tu adik aku ada dekat rumah sebab dia apply cuti.
So masa birthday adik tu aku masak sedap-sedap, buat surprise untuk dia, sebab aku nak mak happy.
Aku bawa mak pegi Secret recipe untuk booking kek adik, gi kedai emas sebab nak suruh mak pilih hadiah untuk adik, mak pun pilih gelang baru untuk dia sendiri. Aku happy sebab masa tu mak happy sangat..
Malam birthday adik aku kami semua happy. Mak la yang paling happy sebab dapat buat surprise untuk adik, mak siap tidur pluk adik lagi masa tu.
Adik da 28 tahun tau. So korang boleh tekalah aku umur berapa. Birthday kakak aku pula mak siap suruh aku pesan delivery surprise untuk kakak, bagi money bouquet.
So balik kepada birthday aku, awal pagi tu adik ada wish birthday aku dekat group whatsapp kitorang.. Macam biasalah aku tunggu kata-kata dan doa seorang mak untuk aku.. Takde .. Haha..
Aku tunggu sampai malam, sampai esok, still takde.. Mak kan tak tau birthday aku.. Takpelah. Nasib baik ada housemates aku yang bagi surprise kek malam tu hehe..
Esoknya aku video call mak, mak tanya ade apa, aku cakap saja rindu nak balik jumpa mak, mak hanya respond ‘ish nak rindu rindu jelah tak payah la nak bagitahu guna video call, lagi pun kau mana boleh balik takut nanti kau bawa cvd’ ..
Guys hati aku halncur berderai masa ni tapi aku kuatkan untuk ketawa konon-konon aku anggap mak bergurau, tup-tup mak off video call.
Aku call semula, tapi mak cakap mak letih nak tidur. Sampai harini mak takde call aku balik. Hehehe takpelah nak buat macam mana..
So malam ni setakat ni jelah. Maaf cerita aku tak tersusun. Sebab terlalu banyak memori dalam kepala aku ni. Aku cuma harap mak aku nampak effort aku untuk minta disayangi..
Dan guys, korang doakan mak aku sentiasa panjang umur ya. Mak jelah harta aku dunia akhirat.. Oh aku mungkin takkan menulis lagi dekat sini..
Aku harini seorang cikgu bahasa inggeris dekat sekolah menengah di pedalaman negeri di Borneo.
Aku harap cerita aku sedikit sebanyak boleh korang jadikan iktibar dan pedoman. Jangan pilih kasih dekat anak-anak, walau macam mana pun ragam anak itu, dia tetap drah daging..
Dan aku pesan macam ni bukan sebab konon-kononnya aku da besar aku da berjaya aku akhirnya paling dibanggakan, takkkk.
Tapi apa yang aku cuba nak sampaikan ialah, apa yang jadi dekat aku dulu, walau pun aku da tua, ada ramai kawan-kawan yang buat aku happy, tapi in the end of the day, I am still crying thinking about my childhood memories.
How it triggered my mind every single night before I sleep. Be happy, Mak, I love you ..
Ini antara respon sedih netizen.
Suria. Kak lang… klu kak lang ada depan mata…saya akan pluk kak lang…pluk kasih seorg ibu..sayangilah diri sendiri dan tak perlu menagih pada yg tak sudi…ckup la menjadi anak yg tak menderhaka…moga kak lang dikurniakan suami dan mentua yg penuh dengan kasih syg dan kebahagiaan
Fatini. Thank you, teacher ajar saya jadi ibu yg lebih baik. Walaupun anak baru sorang tapi teacher ajar saya nak buat apa utk anak rasa happy. Makan sama, jgn lupa birthday, raikan pencapaian, jgn compare, be a listener. One day you’ll be an amazing mother.
Marina.Kak Lang.. saya tak tau cakap apa, I just want to hug you. With the warmest hug. And I wish you can imagine you have my shoulder to cry on.
Saya nangis baca luahan Kak Lang. Saya pun ‘Lang’ juga di rumah.
Stay strong, ingatlah, jika tak rasa sayang tu dari rumah atau ibumu, kerana kebaikan dari dirimu..
Allah, Kuasa teragung akan sayangkan mu dengan kasih sayang yang melimpah ruah dari orang lain. Semua kebaikan akan kembali kepadamu Kak Lang.
Hugs, remember in this world ada orang yang sayangkan awak.
Sharlie. Anakanda….kamu tidak keseorgan dlm ujianNya…..Sebak Bonda membaca kisah anakanda, teringat Kisah yg hampir sama dgn bonda…. Alhamdulillah, berkat sabar Dan doa, kasih Allah Maha Luar Biasa….
akhirnya Bonda temui kebahagiaan di hujung usia bila dpt mertua Dan ipar duai yg baik. Moga awk berjodoh dgn insan yg betul² ya.
Insya Allah moga mereka akan menyayangi,menghormati & menghargai anakanda sebaik² nya..Ada Pelangi Selepas Hujan.
Fatin. Allah sruh ank hormati ibu bapa.. Tp dlm x sedar bila jd kes2 mcm sis ni ramai ank yg jd derhaka jd pendosa kerana sikap ibu bapa tu sdri.. Alhamdulillah sis pilih jalan yg Allah redhai.. Terus bersabar..ganjaran pahala yg x ternilai ats kesabaran itu..
Linda. Saya tau dan faham perasaan tu…..Kisah kita lebih kurang sama….dah tak larat nak bertahan saya undur diri…bawa diri. Alhamdulillah bersama suami dan anak2 skrg….semoga saya sayang anak2 saya sebaik mungkin tanpa pilih kasih…semoga Allah permudahkan urusan awak.
Amaline. Sebak, sedih, kesian. Stop chasing, do not give so much of yourself to people who won’t do the same for you. Nanti awak sendiri yg terluk4 dan penat sbb terlalu mengharap.
Jauhkan diri buat seketika, cari kedamaian. Sy doakan Allah bukakan pintu hati Mak awak dan sedar kesilapan dia selama nie. Stay strong
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